Re: Help for Oerjan

On Sun, 8 Oct 2000 Conchart@geotec.net wrote:

> Reminds me of that add I saw on television when I wan in Toronto 
earlier
> this year, the guy up behind the podium on a tirade about being
Canadian,
> and pronouncing it about, not aboot. Pretty damn funny.

Smart man! That's the one - it's a Molson beer ad, but it's become
something of a national rallying cry... Takes the piss out of a pile of
national cliches, and (this is Canada, after all) manages to get a few
jabs in at the Yanks as well. (It's even funnier because Molson has a
brand of beer called 'Canadian'...)

On Canada Day last July we had the actor from the ad here in town,
giving
a live version of the spiel - he had the crowd chanting it along with
him
and everything - howling funny.

Here, for the record, is the text of the ad:

******
I AM CANADIAN
(clears throat)

Hey.

I'm not a lumberjack, or a fur trader...
and I don't live in an igloo, or eat blubber, or own a dogsled...
and I don't know Jimmy, Sally or Suzy from Canada,
although I'm certain they're really, really nice.

I have a Prime Minister, not a President.
I speak English and French, NOT American.
and I pronounce it 'ABOUT',   NOT 'A BOOT'.

I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack.
I believe in peace keeping, NOT policing.
DIVERSITY, NOT assimilation,
AND THAT THE BEAVER IS A TRULY PROUD AND NOBLE ANIMAL.
A TOQUE IS A HAT,  A CHESTERFIELD IS A COUCH,
AND IT IS PRONOUNCED 'ZED' NOT 'ZEE', 'ZED'!!!

CANADA IS THE SECOND LARGEST LAND MASS!
THE FIRST NATION OF HOCKEY!
AND THE BEST PART OF NORTH AMERICA!

MY NAME IS JOE!!

AND I AM CANADIAN!!!!!!!!
******

At this point, all the Canadians are grinning, and everyone else is
wondering what the heck is going on...

Now, I'm not sure I should post this next bit, but it is kind of
funny...
it's not true of anyone on this list, but here's one Canadian's (not
mine!) take on Americans, in a parody of the 'I am Canadian' rant
above...
more playing on national stereotypes.

******
I AM AMERICAN

Waazzzzzzzzzuuuuuuuupppp...

I'm not particularly intelligent, open-minded, or well-liked.
And I don't live in a safe place, eat a balanced diet, or drive very
well.
I don't know Shakespeare, Da Vinci or Gutenberg,
Although I'm pretty sure they weren't American.

I drink piss, not beer,
I am outspoken, not opinionated,
Guns settle disputes, not discussions.
Winning isn't everything, it's the ONLY thing,
And it's pronounced RUFF, not ROOF.

I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack, unless I go
somewhere.
Burger King IS fine dining.
Washing after peeing is for LOSERS,
Twinkies and Moon Pies ARE GOOD for breakfast,
I have a SHED, NOT a GARAGE,
and WWF ACTION IS REAL!!

The UNITED STATES OF AMERICA is the ONLY country in the world,
The FIRST nation of IGNORANCE,
And the BEST part of SOUTH AMERICA!!

My name is Bubba Ray Billy-Bob Jethero Cletus...
AND I AM AMERICAN!!!!!!!!
******

Warned you, didn't I? Should I be glad that Canada Customs takes a dim
view of Americans bringing their arsenels into my country? :>

Brian - yh728@victoria.tc.ca -
- http://warbard.iwarp.com/games.html -