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Re: Mission to Mars

From: "Mark A. Siefert" <siefert@m...>
Date: Thu, 16 Mar 2000 10:00:30 -0600
Subject: Re: Mission to Mars

Nyrath the nearly wise wrote:
>	  I beg to differ. <grin>

	I had the suspcision when they aired the promo for movie that it
was
going to be a leaker.  

>	  In zero gee, making a helix composed of M&M candies
>	  *revolve* ??!!?  Only if the director never
>	  heard of Newton's First Law.	Or if there was
>	  an invisible black hole in the center, stretched
>	  into a line.

	Hollywood Producer:  "But it looks cool."

>	  Spacesuit thrust jets at shoulder level.  I guess
>	  they like doing somersaults in space.
>	  You do remember in Heinlein's STARSHIP TROOPERS
>	  how he mentioned that the powered armor suit jets
>	  had their axis of thrust passing through the center of mass?

	Hollywood Producer:  "But... it... looks... cool."
 
>	  A plot device that depends on the concept of inertia,
>	  followed by an attempted rescue that violates the concept
>	  of intertia.	At the least the director should have been
>	  consistent.

	Hollywood Producer:  "I SAID IT LOOKS COOL OK!!! WE IN TINSEL
TOWN HAVE
THE TIME OR INCLINATION TO MAKE SURE THAT WHAT WE CREATE IS FACTUAL!  IF
COOL SPECIAL EFFECTS AND/OR LARGE MAMMARY GLANDS IS WHAT IT TAKES TO
BRING IN THE NERDS, THEN BY GEORGE LUCAS WE'LL DO IT!!!!!"
 
>	  And don't forget the Face on Mars.  Even though the
>	  latest NASA photos show that it is just another cliff.
>
http://mars.jpl.nasa.gov/mgs/msss/camera/images/4_6_face_release/index.h
tml

	That's what THEY want you to think!  NASA doctored those photos
to make
the face look like a cliff!  They are already under the influence of the
Zondar thought control rays and have been since ROSWELL.  Quick, put
this on!  What do you mean it's just a tin foil hat?  This will screen
out the hypnotronic beam's effects!
 
>	  The astronauts view a computer graphic of a DNA molecule
>	  inside a spaceship that cannot take off because all the
>	  computers are fried.
	
	"Intel Inside."
 
>	  The greenhouse also ignores a few other scientific facts:
>	  [1] There is no water vapor in the Martian atmosphere. None.
>	  [2] The sunlight at Mars is half that at Earth, and it is
>	  being filtered through canvas.  Plants can live off that?

	Well, there on a diet.
	
>	  [3] Canvas cannot create the greenhouse effect.  You need
>	  something transparent to visible light and reflective to
>	  infared light.  Canvas doesn't cut it.  Especially when
>	  the average temperature on the Martian surface is something
>	  like seventy degrees below zero.

	NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH... Canvas???

>	  Nice happy ending as well.  The astronauts merrily travel
>	  home to Earth, on a trip that takes a minimum of six
>	  months, in a ship that has no food.  Have fun while you
>	  starve to death.  Then draw straws to see who gets eaten.

	They should have cristened the ship the U.S.S. Donnor or the
U.S.S.
Packard.

-- 
Later,
Mark A. Siefert

	"Isn't life pretty," Ernest Hemingway once said,
	and then he put a bullet through his head.

				      --On the Shoulders of Freaks,
					Henry Phillips	

E-MAIL: siefert@milwpc.com	      WWW: http://www.uwm.edu/~cthulhu
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