RE: Santa - Don't Mess With The Fat Old Dude

That's not debris, it's coal for those "bad" boys and girls!

Michael Brown

-----Original Message-----
From:	Thomas Barclay 
Sent:	Sunday, December 16, 2001 5:46 PM
To:	gzg-l@csua.berkeley.edu
Subject:	Santa - Don't Mess With The Fat Old Dude

Ho Ho Ho, Twas the Night Before Xmas....

To stop Santa:

Send the X-files dude and his cute sidekick. Or 
maybe they'd end up helping Santa. They're 
kind of ambigous.

Of course, many major Toy Companies would 
send corporate security, since they clearly don't 
want the Old Commie Punter giving away toys. 
That eats into corporate profits. 

Another group against Santa would be 
puritanical religous zealots who see St. Nick as 
a bad image. Well equiped with everything 
except a sense of humor and anything 
approaching common sense. 

A group of anti-materialist protestors who'd 
say that the man in the red fuzzy jams is 
encouraging aspirations of wealth and greed on 
the impressionable young folk and that all gifts 
should be of the immaterial kind. And of course, 
they themselves would never try to influence the 
impressionable young folk, no siree bob. 

On Santa's side:

Kick arse elves. These guys can manufacture 
just about anything. I'm sure the sleigh they 
built the old man has massive stealth, PDS 
galore, plenty of decoys, superior ECM, etc. 
And I'm sure the Elves can field some rather 
obnoxious troops - probably deployed via fast-
suborbital drop. Though finding 3.5' tall PA with 
curly toed boots might be a challenge.....

Reindeer who are alleged to get huge 
multipliers in charge attacks. The lead reindeers 
nose is supposed to attract jam guided 
weapons... "you might even say it glows!".

A rather large obnoxious yeti who actually is a 
nice enough creature when you get right down 
to it. (If you've ever seen the old animated 
Xmas special with the Yeti and the Snowman, 
you'll know who I mean). Probably treated as a 
class 1 or 2 infantry walker. 

Just some suggestions. I'd consider giving 
Santa an ability to use dummy markers, 
representing his ability to displace himself by 
wiggling his nose.... you wouldn't know if he'd 
be there when you fired upon him. Plus I 
imagine his sled has a pretty high armour value, 
despite being open topped. Probably has a 
force field to deflect the wind. (That old boy has 
to be able to move to hit all the households he 
has to visit....)

And if anyone is chasing Santa, he might have 
picked up a trick or two watching Ord Sarno 
pod racing at ECC - lob a couple of chunks of 
debris off the sled in the general backwards 
direction - this tends to deter pursuers 
explosively..... 

Tomb. 

-----------------------------------------------------------
Thomas Barclay
Instructor, CST 6304 (TCP/IP programming for the Internet)
kaladorn@fox.nstn.ca 
http://fox.nstn.ca/~kaladorn/CST6304
http://stargrunt.ca/tb/CST6304