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RE: SG Humor

From: Noah Doyle <nvdoyle@m...>
Date: Sun, 30 Aug 1998 19:58:44 -0500
Subject: RE: SG Humor


Shoon Writes:

 I found this in the newsgroups and thought it was too funny not to 
share...

Exerpted from Jane's Guide to Wargamers, 4th ed., regarding the
differences between Stargrunt players and Warhammer 40,000 players.

SG players want a game that looks and feels like a historical,
but with rayguns.
 40k players want a game that looks and feels like a RPG,
  but with miniatures.

XXX Boy, if 40k is like an RPG, I don't want to play that RPG (Blam! 
Blam! 
 OK, everybody roll up new characters...)

SG players believe that realism is very important; the lack
  thereof makes WH40k a bad game.
40k players believe that drama is very important; the lack
  thereof makes Stargrunt a bad game.

XXX Drama?  The only drama I remember in recent 40k is who brought what 
latest super-character - that pretty much determined who won.  Old 40k 
(yes, I used to play - back when there was one book, it was US$20, and
20 
Space Marines were US$15) drama consisted of whether or not the scratchb
 
uilt walker would survive any handling	XXX

The ideal of realism, to a SG player, is of course the SG universe.
The ideal of drama, to a 40k player, is of course the 40k universe.

XXX Ask most SG players what their ideal of realism is, and a glaze will

come over their distant eyes, and they'll mumble "Well, I've got this
set 
of rules I've been working on..."  Ask 40k players what their ideal of 
drama is, and of course it's 40k.  But it's sort of like past-life 
regression; everybody's the King of Spain, or the Emperor's Grand 
Inquisitor Terminator Chaos Librarian.	Nobody's the poor dumb Imperial 
Guard troopie who buys it on the first turn in some really unpleasant 
way.XXX

On a weekend when they aren't gaming, SG players may be found
  calculating the instability of the ringworld or the specific
  density of the BOLA.
On a weekend when that aren't gaming, 40k players may be found
  watching the latest WWF special on pay-per-view.

XXX Naw, we're all sitting around coming up with new and ingenious uses
for 
Frenchmen, and the occasional house rule :) XXX

SG players reject any game that isn't strictly realistic because
  it goes against their hard SF fanboy tendencies.
40k players reject any game that isn't like theirs because GW
  tells them to. :]

XXX Hard SF Fanboy - oh yeah!  My Terran MI can take your weenie Space 
Marines any day!  Why? Well, for one, we've got realistic background, 
substance, and a coherent reason for existing!	How about that?XXX

SG players don't like Star Wars because Darth Vader isn't hard SF.
40k players don't like Star Wars because Luke is a wuss.
(incidentally, Legions of Steel players like Star Wars lots,
 but wonder why Threepio doesn't get to kick any ass)

XXX NOTHING in SW was hard SF.	Wasn't supposed to be.	But I was 
disappointed that Star Destroyers didn't have some mucking huge spinal 
weapon.  BTW, I saw some Traveller TNE calculations for a Star Destroyer

with an appropriate spinal mount (meson gun).  Tech 21, about 1.25 km - 
that thing could put the hurt on a planet REAL bad...XXX

SG players read lots of Heinlien & Asimov, but probably very little
  Hemingway.
40k players read lots of Wells & Lovecraft, but probably very little
  Hemingway.

XXX Of course I read Hemingway.  All of my ESU Volunteer Brigades are
quite 
angst-ridden, and we have bull-runs occasionally.  They rarely make it
past 
the first APSW.  40k players read? :) XXX

It is a bad idea to question a SG player concerning his gaming
  prefrences.
It is a bad idea to question a 40k player concerning his gaming
  prefrences.

XXX No, it's a *good* idea to question SG players' gaming preferences - 
you'll usually get a well reasoned answer, and spark some productive 
discussion.  They can also tell you *exactly* why they hate 40k, too. 
As 
for the 40k players, well, "nothing else looks as cool" (real quote, 
honest). XXX

XXXNoahXXX

Schoon

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